Stupid diet saying

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

I hate this statement. I see it on Pinterest all the time and  it’s such a stupid thing to say. And it’s not fucking true. I’ve been skinny (or at least thinner) and it’s total horseshit. A bunch of things totally taste better.

Here’s my list of things that taste better than skinny feels…

• A big giant cheesesteak. Preferably from a subshop that knows their shit when it comes to a good cheesesteak. With mayo. Yum.
• This bread. I’ve made it. It’s really smack your mama good. (No, I wouldn’t actually smack my mother. She’d totally win that fight.)
• Cheez-its. I don’t care about whatever processed fake-ass chemicals are in there. I could eat a box of those a day.
• Pizza. Duh. Extra cheese, pepperoni, onions, banana peppers, black olives and mushrooms. I’d eat that and not care about the fast train to Heartburn City that I would be on afterwards.

That’s enough for now. I’m really hungry and there are none of these things in the house. But hey, I’ve got apples. Yeah, totally the same thing. No, no, no, no.

Today’s post was obviously brought to you by me eating my lunch at 10am and not having anything else to eat for the next five hours at school and being really freaking hungry and pissed about my new 1300-1500 calorie/day diet.